Amber Heard and the culture of silencing as well as blaming women

IMG_20160423_211913

When the divorce was first announced I watched as almost every single comment called Amber Heard a “slut” “whore” “gold digging whore” even though Johnny Depp was the one in a relationship, with kids, who left his girlfriend for a younger woman. Amber was called so many things, and accused of using Johnny Depp, turns out, he’s a wife beater. Cue all the Johnny Depp fans defending the actor because they like his movies and “he’s not that kind of man”, because we know strangers so well? Stoya, Kesha, Amber, April, Bill Cosby’s 60+ victims to name a few etc. When will ever believe women?

13307344_1230860076925030_2190606408672993936_n

13256418_1230965940247777_1371171072862516002_n

People who accuse women of lying about domestic violence because of reason X, Y and Z don’t seem to understand that domestic violence, abuse, manipulation etc entails. My biological mother was married for 23 years with my biological father. He was abusive since year 1, pushed her in the stairs when she told him she was pregnant, but told him the “gender” of the fetus (aka, me). He was always a charming man, a musician, very intelligent, never rude when people were over, but behind it all, he was an alcoholic who beat his wife every single day, was a pedophile, beat me as well (the perks of being a woman, my father was spared). After 23 years, she divorced him, not for the abuse, not for the violence, not for the fear, but because it was time to for her. He never gave her a penny then, never gave a penny after, she spoke fondly of him, allowed him to see her kids even though the divorce didn’t stop the abuse, simply moved most of it to me.

My biological mother was clearly a woman who struggled, she struggled with making decisions for herself but she also struggled with the guilt that comes with divorcing the father of your three children. She had not job, had moved to a new country she’d never been too because he’d taken a job there, had never worked a day in her life, suddenly she’d be alone with 3 kids with no family or friends. There is a lot more behind the little we know, when we hear of women who stay in abusive relationships, what about the women who marry wealthy men? They will be believed even less, accuse of seeking money, attention etc. This, the way so many people are reaction even though they do not know what an abusive relationship is, what it’s like being in one, that is the reason why so many women, people, stay, because we shame them when they dont.

‪#‎IbelieveAmber‬ ‪#‎IamwithAmber‬ ‪#‎believewomen‬

13315306_1230751773602527_1694723195821385324_n

Twitter: https://goo.gl/FOqXOy
Instagram: https://goo.gl/HIXsXm
Twitch: https://goo.gl/ztVbRE
Women in Gaming: http://goo.gl/pxBxLp

Advertisements

One thought on “Amber Heard and the culture of silencing as well as blaming women

  1. If my friend tells me she was sexually assaulted at midnight and says it was a really bright day I will believe her. I don’t give a s**t if her story changes five or fifty time. I would believe her. Because this is one of the worst kinds of trauma and causes distortions in memory. Victims are NOT lying. Just because something isn’t remember exactly as it might have happened does not mean it didn’t happen. The lengths people will go to to discredit a victim are sickening.

    Like

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s